2013 Darwin Award.

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mountainmailorder
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2013 Darwin Award.

Postby mountainmailorder » Mon Jun 10, 2013 9:17 am

I would like to announce the winner of this years' SACDA Award. That stands for South African Climbing Darwin Award.
SACDA it to me, as they say.

The recipient stole a set of draws and cut a rope, but was caught out in a matter of a few hours.

He was easily identified.

Consider the supporting evidence:
1/ He signed in to Chosspile with his own name, even giving the correct phone number. He was the only climber to do so all week. Everyone else either didn't sign in, or nobody actually climbed here. This is South Africa, and the year is 2013. Nobody uses their own name and phone number any more.

2/ He then posted pictures of his newly acquired draws and rope on his Facebook profile. The stolen draws had white enamel painted on them, making identification rather easy.

3/ Circumstantial stuff: a week before stealing these draws, the award winner posts a forum message on climb.co.za looking for a used set of draws to purchase. Hint for next time: don't let the cat out the bag too early.

4/ In his Facebook photo, he is seen hanging on only one draw and anchor while cleaning the draw, claiming this is "hard core". We also like to think that Flashed draws are supercool & ultrastrong and that Hilti bolts are bulletproof, but this definitely does not qualify to be hard core. Use both anchors if you can. Hard core would be red-pointing the route like Brian Weaver did.

5/ The award winner only got up the route 10 m and then decided to cut the rope. We are not quite sure how he got down, cutting his own rope above his head and then crashing down? Maybe he stole a crash pad somewhere else ? That would be too smart. We suspect he did something else because he walked out. But he could have easily aided up to the top of the route, cleaned the route and all draws and scored a full 70m Mammut rope instead of cutting it, and also netted a whole set of draws. I mean, why limit yourself like this? That's just dumb.

So, without much further ado, the 2013 SACDA winner is......drumroll.....


Hanno Bisschoff


Hanno, you are the proud new owner of a Flashed Quickdraw. Please send us your postal address so we can send it to you. Postage will be free. We might even get Andrew or Brian to autograph it for you with white enamel paint.
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DavidWade
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby DavidWade » Mon Jun 10, 2013 9:34 am

If someone cuts my 70 meter Mammut rope ill cut their balls off! :evil:

Marshall1
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Marshall1 » Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:10 am

.
Last edited by Marshall1 on Mon May 11, 2015 7:31 am, edited 1 time in total.

Warren G
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Warren G » Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:34 am

at the foot of Boneyard (Kloof Gorge, KZN) stands a proud tree, so proud that one day a school boy on an afternoon climbingtrip decided to carve his name into the tree. So inspired by this act was his school master that he ensured ERROL never climbed again. I believe the grand prize for being caught steeling gear off routes should be a shunning, and the community ensuring the thief never has anyone to climb with again. confiscating his gear and donating it to a local club/school etc might be a more appropriate reward, but certainly some community service.
Sandbagging is a dirty game

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Hann
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Hann » Mon Jun 10, 2013 11:04 am

Marshall1 wrote:Theft cannot be rewarded.


Agreed.

(but I do suspect this is an attempt at sneaky and free advertisement)

lukew
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby lukew » Mon Jun 10, 2013 12:50 pm

Shame, Errol, the poor swamp dragon that never learned to use his fireducts! He really didn't climb again but not from the scorn he received. I definitely don't condone any form of theft, but perhaps we should look at this instance to educate the youngster with regards to his misdemeanors. We all made mistakes in the past, some of them not as severe as this I'm sure, but ones that we sometimes cringe when we relive. Seeing and hearing this persons grasp basic physics is a bit scary and hope that he can be guided into the correct practice of the sport before he hurts himself or others. If he was more ingrained in the climbing community he may have understood the principle of leaving gear behind and what it is for as opposed to "Hey, look what someone left behind!" Understand that I am not saying that what he did is justified, but by shunning him is not going to help him learn the safety part of the sport nor of the other small quirks of climbing that are not so apparent to those that are just starting.

Andy Davies
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Andy Davies » Mon Jun 10, 2013 2:25 pm

Excellent Darwin Award Mr Braaier :lol:

This case is a bit of an extreme one, but please fellow climbers, if you find some kit at the crag, make an effort to return it to the owner. I was appalled to hear someone tell me when they find a lonely quickdraw at a crag they split it up so the owner won't be able to recognise / claim it. Come on, the wheel turns in life. Karma will bite your ass if you act like one.
AndyDavies

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Forket
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Forket » Mon Jun 10, 2013 2:43 pm

it was an 80m :shock:

eT
And who took the photo, he wasnt alone

mokganjetsi
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby mokganjetsi » Mon Jun 10, 2013 2:52 pm

karma is a bitch.jpg
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GregB
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby GregB » Tue Jun 11, 2013 1:25 pm

Warren, what is the punishment for steeling another climber’s cutlery and plate? Being quite hypocritical don’t you think?

hannobisschoff

Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby hannobisschoff » Fri Jun 14, 2013 10:27 pm

mountainmailorder wrote:please send us your postal address so we can send it to you. Postage will be free. We might even get Andrew or Brian to autograph it for you with white enamel paint.


haha for real?

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mountainmailorder
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby mountainmailorder » Fri Jun 14, 2013 10:41 pm

absolutely. are you? pm me. (public disclosure of your address might be harmful to your health, given some of the responses).

you provided many hours of entertainment for the climbing community. a draw is a small price to pay for that.

- R

Marshall1
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Marshall1 » Fri Jun 14, 2013 10:51 pm

.
Last edited by Marshall1 on Mon May 11, 2015 7:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Forket
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Forket » Fri Jun 14, 2013 11:17 pm

shhhhh, your not suppose to tell people about the 99% markup on all climbing gear in south africa:P

eT

pillick
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby pillick » Sat Jun 15, 2013 12:00 pm


Theft cannot be rewarded.

If you send this rooster a free draw...you deserve your own Darwin Award.


Agreed

Shameless marketing this is.

MMO is sending mixed messages. Its not cool to steal, but we will prey on your folly and reward you for it...

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Forket
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Forket » Sat Jun 15, 2013 12:53 pm

its called impact advertising or shock advertising

eT
its all on wikipedia

pillick
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby pillick » Sun Jun 16, 2013 7:56 pm

But Forkey, I thought you said only morons use google or wikipedia....

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Forket
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Forket » Sun Jun 16, 2013 10:42 pm

Im sure you are mistaken, I used the term "reference"
Legally speaking(I had to study this cr@p): I did not use information from the site, so I did not reference it. I merely stated that you could find it there. On the other hand, the situation you referring to, Ansie referenced wikipedia by copying a link of someones opinion on "the law". As I have made numerous fake wikipedia entries(I troll that place a lot more than here), i know not to reference it.

eT
There is a difference

hannobisschoff

Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby hannobisschoff » Fri Jun 21, 2013 12:36 am

Anyway... Thanks for the quickdraw MMO!... Crime doesn't pay but publishing does :wink:

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emile
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby emile » Fri Jun 21, 2013 7:05 am

Forket wrote:As I have made numerous fake wikipedia entries(I troll that place a lot more than here), i know not to reference it.


Your mother must be so proud. Do you piss in the river upstream from your campsite too?


1d
should know better than to argue with idiots

Deon
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Deon » Fri Jun 21, 2013 8:08 am

Forket... do you actually make or have the time to troll on Wikipedia!?
You reeealy need a girlfriend or something :lol:

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Forket
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby Forket » Fri Jun 21, 2013 10:28 am

@emile: Your idea has been noted, and will feature in a movie, coming soon (Early next year) to Piratebay.whatever. Name: "No rest day required"

eT

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emile
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Re: 2013 Darwin Award.

Postby emile » Sat Jun 22, 2013 1:07 pm

I see you did some major editing on your last post Forket. Shame. Next you'll be making anonymous posts.


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